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take my heart, ill let you break it. [entries|friends|calendar]
vagina's break hearts.

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[21 Nov 2005|04:46pm]
[ mood | indescribable ]

my life is crashing down around me.

....and there's nothing i can do about it.

everything is hopeless.

all i do is cry.


my mom found my real "dad" and i wrote him a letter.

...she doesnt want me to give him our address though, which blows because i really want to hear from him (if he cares enough to write back that is)...maybe ill just put it in the letter instead of on the envelope. i really doubt he'll come all the way from Florida to like see me or us or whatever. he didnt care then, i dont think he cares now..but it's worth a try.


i feel like shit.

i cant handle things anymore.

i just want to die.


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gert plus pip [09 Nov 2005|11:11am]
[ mood | amused ]

being in love is nice.

i hope everyone is doing well.

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kevin plus aubrey equals love. heck yes. [01 Oct 2005|12:41pm]
[ mood | amused ]

the boy loves me.
uh huh.

2 ♥//post comment

worthless. [17 Aug 2005|07:33pm]
[ mood | disappointed ]

drama drama drama.

i cut myself.

i talked to tiffany.

im a horrible person.

i love chris.

i want him to hate me.

the end.


2 ♥//post comment

[11 Jul 2005|06:05pm]
[ mood | nervous ]

god and the way her heart would skip a beat when he laid eyes on her and solely on her.......
But then reality hit hard and truth sunk in.....
she was swimming in a world of sorriest and broken promises....
this boy was never around to name her place......
this boy was always to busy with everything else except what had to do with her....
and was once so beautiful had now turned into a bitter sweet melody.....
and if she said that her heart was sore it sounded like a cheap metaphor so she didn’t repeat it anymore.....
there once was this girl who was so in love with this boy that she lost all sense of reality, and most importantly forgot who she was.....
she was so in love that she got lost in his translation.......
he was so magnetizing....so paralyzing and very uninviting....
she made the hardest decision of her life.....
now she is more then heartbroken.....
she has the scars on her arms that will never heal to prove it.....
pictures fade but memory is forever.....
I will forever be lost in his endeavor......
and all the meantime all that runs through her mind is..."HOW CAN LOVE BE So CRUEL WHEN ALL THAT I DID WAS FOR YOU"

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over it. [19 Jun 2005|10:20am]

im so sick of having to apologize to him when im crying and im sick of him getting upset with me for not wanting to talk about what's wrong...maybe im just sick of him...

2 ♥//post comment

scarey. [18 Jun 2005|12:19pm]
[ mood | amused ]

it's so strange when you're finally over someone and the just realize how much they love you. i dont like it much.

2 ♥//post comment

you gave my heart chicken pox. [25 May 2005|06:06pm]
[ mood | sick ]

went to school sick.
*phys. ed.: was really gay. i almost threw up from all the running...no more eating muffins and drinking coke before p.e. anymore.
*english: gay like usual. tiff kept me pretty entertained though...what with her constant arguments with Dr. Phil and all.
*math: boring like usual. went on the internet....did some problems...the norm.

so crazy! i got home and the phone rang and i was like, i bet it's chris...and it was.
went to church with him. it was very fun. we sat outside before it started and we just talked and talked [with a little action thrown in there   some-where] he makes me very happy.


 woke up at like 3 in the morning and i couldnt breathe. didnt get back to sleep until almost 5. i didnt go to school today.
 i woke up at 8, had an ice cream sandwich. went back to sleep. woke up at 9 and ate soup. went back to sleep.
 watched too much dawson's creek and jerry springer. dad bought me Taco Bell.
 talked to Kara...i really miss that kid. told her about the happenings.

 that's about it.


4 ♥//post comment

bored. [21 May 2005|07:05pm]
[ mood | complacent ]

nothing to do today...this shit is real gay.

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for him. [20 May 2005|07:18am]
[ mood | accomplished ]

So many thoughts rushing through my mind,
And I'm terribly unsure of what to do,
Do I listen to my own feelings, my voice,
Or do I always stay true to you.

Should I wait around until you need me again,
Or stand up and forever close the door,
My heads telling my something different to my heart,
And my own feelings are so unsure.

I always promised myself that I'd be here for you,
But I've already stayed for so long,
Maybe I didn't realize in my paralyzed state,
That you've already been and gone.

I hate to let you down my Darling,
But I've done more for you than you'll know,
It's time for me to walk away forever,
I'm sorry but I have to let you go.

2 ♥//post comment

<3 [17 May 2005|06:27pm]
[ mood | depressed ]

you think i'd be happier...

2 ♥//post comment

roof. [19 Apr 2005|09:35pm]
[ mood | cheerful ]

i have a new found love for church.

2 ♥//post comment

crap. [18 Apr 2005|07:25am]
[ mood | sad ]

 i cant stop crying.

I am thinking it's a sign that the freckles In our eyes are mirror images and when We kiss they're perfectly aligned And I have to speculate that God himself Did make us into corresponding shapes like Puzzle pieces from the clay True, it may seem like a stretch, but Its thoughts like this that catch my troubled Head when you're away when I am missing you to death When you are out there on the road for Several weeks of shows and when you scan The radio, I hope this song will guide you home They will see us waving from such great Heights, 'come down now,' they'll say But everything looks perfect from far away, 'come down now,' but we'll stay... I tried my best to leave this all on your Machine but the persistent beat it sounded Thin upon listening That frankly will not fly. you will hear The shrillest highs and lowest lows with The windows down when this is guiding you home .

2 ♥//post comment

[[new]] [06 Apr 2005|01:51pm]
[ mood | artistic ]

And goodnight
Go to sleep
Loose the frrght
Stop the tears
Wipe your eyes
Dream the dream
Of no more lies
Leave the sadness
Drop it behind
Run from reality
Tie the bind
Seek the smile
No more nightmares
Happy is the moment
Someone cares
No more worries
No more fear
Take off the mask
Stay right here
Don’t awake
Dream the dream
That stops the ache

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[[L(OV)E]] [06 Apr 2005|01:38pm]
[ mood | anxious ]

so in love with what we were...

now so alone with just the memories.

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im afraid to be in love...but i think im already there. [04 Apr 2005|07:22pm]
[ mood | calm ]

You make me wanna smoke a cigerette.....

you make me wanna be someone else......

you make me wanna be somebody that you would leave......

and i could forget.

Tell me would you think less of me if I said I could do without you?
Tell me would you jump up and down if I said that you couldnt see me again?
Maybe it would hurt to much to hear I'm not the one that you wanted.
Im better off alone.

You make me wanna smoke a cigerette....

you make me wanna drink a bottle of kessler by myself...

you make me wanna fuck all your friends.....

you make me wanna key your car....

you make me want to love you forever....

1 ♥//post comment

new [25 Mar 2005|11:28pm]
[ mood | amused ]

come up for air.
I cannot breath
when you're near me.

But then you leave.
And my breath returns.
And for a moment. . .
just a moment
I hate you.

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[25 Mar 2005|11:24pm]

Your Beauty lies
in Nature. Down to earth, laid back and a natural
beauty. You have no need for
make-up or accessories that most others do. In fact
you most likely find them a
nuisance. You are probably a little tom-boyish in
your jeans and tees with a
great love for nature. You probably know more about
plants and animals than most
people and you'd rather spend your times outdoors
and in the sun, independent
and free. You can be a bit distant with people,
preferring the company of
animals over people, which isn't always the best
thing. You can be kind and
sweet, but not many see that side of you as you
often have misunderstandings
with people. You are very go-with-the-flow sort of
person and usually try to
avoid fights even if it means changing your opinion
or belief. Still, you are
you look your best actually without make-up and in
casual clothes. Very few can
say that. Be proud.

Some Things
That Represent You:

Earth, Wind Animal: Horse Color:
Green, Purple, Earth Tones Song:
The Memory Of Trees by Enya Expression: Cool

Emerald Mythological Creature: Fairy, Elf
Planet: Earth
Hair Color: Brown Eye Color:
Bright Green

"Horses love me. Cowboys fear me."

Where Does Your Beauty Lie? ..::Original Pictures Are Back! Detailed Results::..
brought to you by Quizilla
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[25 Mar 2005|11:15pm]
tired girl
You are a autum. You are a quiet person. You
really dont' have much to say about anything
unless you are spoken to. You are like the
season spring in your mellow ways. You really
don't get mad really easily. You are very laid
back and a mystery to most. Most men like it.

What Season Best Fits You? (anime pics)
brought to you by Quizilla
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[25 Mar 2005|11:07pm]
You are a dark girl. You have a really quiet and
really a i dont' care attitude. You like to be
alone and that is what you enjoy. You don't
like to be around others and you'd rather be
away from here. You have a get away from me
look and others find you bitchy and
self-rigious. You'd rather read than be at a
fair but that's ok because that's who you are.

Who are you inside????? (LOTS OF RESULTS)girls only
brought to you by Quizilla
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